Mine is not a new story.

(via alwayslost--neverfound)

i kept bugging my mom about not buying me my favorite popsicles

and she kept saying “lacey i will buy them i will buy them relax”

and i came home one day and my mom was like “i bought popsicles” 

so i go to the fridge and open the freezer omg

why did you do this 

mom i know u can hear me

wHY 

WHY TELL ME 

HOW DID YOU EVEN FIND THIS MANY TO BUY AT ONE TIME OMG

(Source: tomlinsass, via bigstrongtoughman)

thespacegoat:

zacksplosion:

gimmegrimmy:

thecityofpawnee:

nerdmodeactivated:

tea-in-the-tardis:

bakuraryou:

OK SO IN ENGLAND THIS IS WHAT A RUBBER IS

AND SOMEONE ON MY DASH JUST MENTIONED PUTTING A ‘RUBBER’ ON YOUR PENIS AND

I GOT REALLY REALLY CONFUSED

THIS IS WHAT WE CALL A RUBBER IN AUSTRALIA TOO. WE FEEL YOUR PAIN.

SAME WITH NEW ZEALAND.

We don’t have those in America because we don’t make mistakes.

THAT WAS ONE TIME

HE WAS ELECTED TWICE.

(via jesse-pinkmeth)

(via alwayslost--neverfound)

aoiasahina:

(p + l)(a + n) = pa + pn + la + ln

i foiled your plan

(via clarkkgregg)

erinred:

loreweaver:

whAT NO THAT’S NOT WHERE I THOUGHT THIS WAS GOING AT ALL

Ha.

(Source: goodbadoldnew, via laynesanity)

Remember that morning when we were worried about Romney being president

(Source: boyswillbewithboys, via boatsnestherho)

fuckyeahcracker:

golden-zephyr:

brashblacknonbeliever:

negritaaa:

rainaweather:

tomhiddlestonswife:

thatsocialjusticebitch:

hinduthug:

I Don’t Understand White People

legit crying rn

she has a tumblr!

http://tazzyphinzel.tumblr.com/

“leggings as pants …”

CRYING

This is so beautiful!

omg, the eating thing!!

ooh she had me until “Headwrapped Hoodrat” on her blog. god bless though.

(via domdomomnom)

(via bigstrongtoughman)

(via not-one-person)

(via sesuhlee)

(Source: onlylolgifs, via ktarrr)

(Source: coloringforgrownups, via domdomomnom)

catsinbutter:

today at work a young hispanic man was having trouble with the bottle machine he was using so i stayed outside with him to help unjam it and help with the bottles and when he was done a bunch of gangsters showed up who knew him apparently and he shook my hand and they were all like ”eeyy you alright man you alright. you ever need anyting you let us know aint nobody gun fuck wit you” and then they taught me this intricate handshake and thats how i accidentally joined a mexican gang today

(via dayinjuly)

(Source: collegehumor, via sesuhlee)